Tuesday, May 4, 2010

No, Stop, Quit, No!

As a parent, I find myself using the words "No," "Stop," and "Quit," quite often. It seems silly that I would post a blog on such matters, but when I think about it, who actually tells the truth about what being a parent truly entails? I have heard people (women mostly) saying that "It's so wonderful being a parent!" My first reaction to this is: are you merely babysitting or are they actually your children? If they are your children, then how much Benadryll do you actually go through on a daily basis?

I can already feel the hate messages coming in, but let's stop and think for a moment . . . which part of parenting is wonderful? Is it during the first few days when everything feels so surreal? Perhaps it is during the period when the baby eats and then immediately falls back to sleep. Yes, it has to be that, because after that stage comes the 'I'm a baby, life revolves around me and I'm here to make your life a living hell' stage. Granted, infants and even toddlers are so cute. They make you smile, they make you say "awwww" at the most inappropriate times, and even I find myself tearing up when my children do something that is extremely cute, but is it all worth it? I'm going to say "it depends on the day."

I miss the good 'ol days when life was simple. It didn't matter if you had a fridge chock-full of real food. It's amazing the kind of things that people can eat and still survive. My wife and I, before children, could live on ramen noodles and bologna sandwiches. Now, we cook real food: mashed potatoes, green beans, steaks, chicken, fish, so on and so forth. We cook the meals that take an hour or more to complete and we do so because of our children. The children have simply made us grow up. I suppose that is a good thing, but by George, I'm a "Toys'R'us kid," and I don't want to grow up. *

disclaimer: this is a copyrighted slogan (I'm sure), I do not feel like being sued, thus my reason behind the disclaimer*.

Anyhow, as I was saying, life changed in ways that I could never have imagined after having children. Most of it is not good for my Toys'R'us side, but it is excellent for my adult/mature side.

I know I know, some of the readers will be offended by my lack of absolute love for parenting, but I'm tired of reading about how wonderful being a parent is, when, in all honesty, it is just a big pain in the rear end. Love me or hate me, I speak the truth.

I digress; I'm sure my child bashing will not be looked upon in a positive light so I'll throw a few extra things in there. True, children are a different kind of fulfillment. They bring responsibility and a certain level of maturity to one's life . . . well, it does for those of us that are actually parents that watch over their children . They can be loads of fun, but the majority of the time they make me realize why my father beat my brothers and I. I would never do this of course, but I suppose I can understand the thought processes that took place in his deranged mind as he was striking us with his fists.

All in all, the verdict is the same, children are our punishments in life. They are the piece of meat that becomes lodged in your tooth, and the harder you fight to get it out, the more irritated you become. However, they are also the reason why adults go to the lengths that they do to become better people. They are the reasons why we work 12-15 hour shifts every night. They are the reason that we grow up and become wise. They are the reason we keep on going day after day after day, even when life becomes unbearable, we still keep going. Odd isn't it? The biggest irritations in our life are the same reasons that we strive to become better people, and the same reason we work so hard to continue life. It's very strange, but also very true. Love me or hate me, I speak the truth.


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